About Me


 

Hi I’m Dave.

 

This is a page devoted strictly to me, so read this if you have absolutely nothing else to do.  Seriously, I’m boring AF.

 

I started Aesthetic Physiques in the summer of 2015 to help answer my friend’s questions about getting in shape.  I figured if they had these questions more people probably had them.  

 

And haazaaa, Aesthetic Physiques was born.

 

If I ever get interviewed that’s what I’ll tell them.  But here is the real story.

 

May 15, 2014,  I was recovering from having a herniated disc removed – all hopped up on percocets – confined to the couch for the foreseeable future.  Which meant a lot of playoff basketball and movies.  

 

One movie that came up multiple times was the Social Network.  You know the one about how Facebook started?  

 

I love that movie and probably have seen it a good 10x since.

 

While watching it for the 4th time, I thought to myself “why not me?”  Why couldn’t I have a website that I could make a living off of?  So I decided to make a website like my fellow Massachusetts native, Steve Kamb did with NerdFitness.  (I don’t know Steve but if you do, tell him I’m in the market for a new friend.)

 

And haazaa, Aesthetic Physiques was born…for reals.

 

Besides running Aesthetic Physiques and hitting the gym; football, video games, wine, bills and boobies run my life.  

 

I also have a sick obsession with Porsches.  Not 100% sure why but it’s always been a goal to have a black 911 in the garage.  Standard shift obviously.  

 

GROWING UP IN RHODE ISLAND

 

I was born and raised in Rhode Island, which has nothing to do with Long Island.  A standard question by girls I was trying to defile in my teens and 20’s. I guess we all couldn’t master the States song in 4th grade.  

 

If you ever hear me talk, I don’t have a speech impediment, it’s just my Rhode Island accent.

 

I’ve always been involved in sports but was never in “sports shape”.  I had no measureable upper body strength and my stomach was more snack pack than six pack.

 

I was a skinny 180 when I graduated high school and that didn’t change until I started semi-pro football five years later.  I hired a personal trainer and bulked up to a 220 pound wide receiver/cornerback.

 

I had gone from Desean Jackson to Andre Johnson in a few months.

 

After 2 disastrous years playing I decided I didn’t like to hit or get hit so I hung up the cleats and stuck to lifting weights.

 

From there I did a few Tough Mudders, Spartan Races and one bodybuilding competition.  The competition was 8 months after back surgery.

 

After the competition I decided to get stronger.  I wanted to bulletproof my back so I started my deadlift everyday program.

 

I upped my deadlift 80 lbs pounds in 75 days.  

 

I also slimmed down from 200 to 185 while keeping my strength.

 

Weightlifting has changed the game for me.  I’m more confident, it helps manage the depression, I’m more ambitious in every aspect of my life and on occasion my wife tells me I’m pretty.

 

So this brings us to now.

 

OMG I’M SO NERVOUS

 

Seeing as this is essentially our first date, I feel like I should answer some random first date questions so you can see if someone is getting laid tonight.

 

Where did you go to school?  Major?

 

I know some people – or most – graduate college in 4 years.  It’s doctors that take 7 years to graduate.  Well I’m not a doctor but I enjoyed college.  I graduated in 2008 at the tender age of 25 from the University of Rhode Island (go Rams!) with a degree in Chemistry.

 

What type of music do you like?

 

I’m all over the place.  My phone has anything from Billie Holiday to Marilyn Manson to Taylor Swift to Jason Aldean.  I mostly stick to heavy metal but I also dabble in a little West Coast Gangsta Rap, Country, Pop and old Jazz..  All time favorite band is Sevendust which I’ve seen close to 10x.

 

Have you traveled anywhere cool?

 

I went to Italy for my honeymoon and recently went to Greece.  Other than that I’ve been to Aruba, all the hot spots in California, Vegas and Montreal.  If you’re looking for a bachelor party destination Montreal is the place to go.  The strip clubs are worth the risk of getting stuck up there.

 

What do you do in your spare time?

 

For me it all depends on the time of day.  In the morning I’ll read.  In the afternoon I’ll nap.  Love me some afternoon naps.  And at night I’ll either watch TV or play Playstation.  More than likely it’s the newest Madden.

 

Something embarrassing?

 

Every year since I think I was 20, my best friend and I will go to the midnight release of Madden.  We can’t hang quite as long as we used to but we can usually get a game in on the night it comes out.  We have yet to miss a year.  

 

Dave

 

P.S. Other random stuff to determine if we can be friends:

 

I like to read nonfiction.

 

Huge fan of stupid comedies like Dumb and Dumber, Anchorman and Old School.

 

I’ll watch anything related to WWII.

 

If I could I’d live off of Cookie Dough ice cream and White Chip and Macadamia Nut cookies I would.

 

I never liked kids until my nephew.

 

Despite living in New England my entire life I despise the Patriots.  I find the cult like following of any sports team unbearable.

 

I think Wolverine is the best superhero.

 

I have a dog named Taco.  He’s a maltese-yorkie mix.  Dude is a chick magnet.

 

I find intolerance of other’s religious views, skin color, class and cultures to be the truest form of ignorance.  However, I think everyone is too serious and easily butt-hurt.